Saturday, December 1, 2012

Pinch and a Punch on the First Day of the Month: December

For me, December has always been and will continue to be quite a month. Being in Australia, another school year will be out, with the internal embodiment of Zac Efron and Vanessa Hudgens in a High School Musicalesque echoing chorus of "Summer. Summer. Summer..." (Please tell me I am not the only person who does that.) It's time to increase our risk of skin cancer diagnosis and to rock up the beach, or to find sanctuary in the air conditioned cinemas, or to take on what I find to be the true holiday spirit and to eat a substantial amount of heavenly food. I find now that when I engage in social outings, my friends and I will plan our get togethers around food. Yum food. Oh a side note, I somehow always find myself embracing and then quickly abandoning a new year's resolution of 'being healthy'.

December is also a blatant month of traditions. Sure, everyone shares Christmas and New Years' together and we meet up with our families and give and receive presents. Yet in this month, I like to embrace my own personal traditions. Every Christmas since I was 15 (which sounds impressive until you consider my current age, 17) I have read only the most beautiful novel, Mark Zusak's The Book Thief. I adopted this tradition after viewing some god awful film with Sandra Bullock being a conceited bitch to Ryan Reynolds. (The Proposal?) Irrespective, it's a smashing custom and nothing that is not really related to the silly season says Christmas to me like The Book Thief. This is fitting, as I kind of despise all Christmas related books/films. With the Christmas spirit restored, Santa and the reindeer were able to give all the girls and boys their go suck a dick. Nothing screams inadequate and unoriginal like a good old Christmas film. There are only a golden few that are bearable, like Love Actually and It's a Wonderful Life and ...

This is why every year, my family watches The Godfather. It's an offer we can never refuse (geddit) and in it there's traditions of our own. My father will always offer his own commentary, but wait, in a terrible European impression while coming to the apparent realisation that he is the Don.
"I am the Don." (in a classic murder of the Sicilian accent)
 "You are not the Don Dad."
"Oh but si, I am."
In the words of Natalie Tran, "I could cut off your lips..."

Earlier then this, however, when Don Corleone and his daughter waltz together at her wedding, Dad will lean in and verify that something identical will occur at my own matrimonial affair. He never senses my sky braising raised eyebrow. Meanwhile, my mother will have already left to attend to another matter, so as to avoid the 'violent'. If she stays as long as the (SPOILER) horse's head, she will have already winced and moaned enough to derive anyone of their sanity. (For fuck's sake, it's a movie about the Mafia)

This year, I am especially excited for December 21. Regardless of whether Hollywood's and the New Age movement's interpretation of the Mayan calendar ending really was legit, I cannot wait to see individuals acting like lunatics. If there is a time that #YOLO will be recklessly embraced, it'll be then. December 21 will be the day of desperate desperate people and it will also be the perfect day for people like me; cynics who have a healthy sense of irony to watch the blockbuster 2012. 

With endings, there also comes its binary opposite beginnings. Starts, firsts, establishments, etc. As this year is ending, I have decided to create my very first zine, just a little something to enjoy in all physicality. Top Knot Issue is a bonus for girl with a top knot readers and it is just a little glance into what December means for both me and you. There's insights from Kobi, an amateur’s survival guide for the end of the world and a vision of my/girl with a top knot's future. 

a preview

It's fun. It's double sided. And it costs zilch. Except for a tree's life. Can you handle that? You also need to fold it a couple of times and to give it a little snip. Please refer to this tutorial. If you follow it correctly, you'll have a mini me of books. You should defs get into it right away.

It's in December that we all realise that another year has trickled away from underneath us and each year it seems to gain more momentum. 2012 is ending, and quickly. Bring on 2013, I say. Bring on the end and bring on the beginning. For all we know, this could be the start of something new.

May Santa Somehow Break Into Your House and Deliver All That You Desire Under Your Tree,
girl with a top knot x

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